Dec 6, 2019
(Listener Note: This is Step #9 of this 12 step series. To take full advantage of this please visit our show archive and listen to the episodes in their proper order).
It is normal to feel hurt, anger, blame and resentment while going through divorce. It is a devastating and traumatic transition, one that we all resist and that no one escapes without experiencing these painful feelings at some point in the process. Karen McMahon and Karen Basmagy discuss the pitfalls of living in resistance and the benefits of learning to accept what is.
When we feel stuck and overwhelmed, it is a red flag that we are resisting what is happening to our lives. It sounds something like, “This isn’t happening!”, “I can’t believe s/he is doing this!”, “It wasn’t supposed to be this way!”, “This is all my/his/her fault”. When we are in resistance, we remain stuck in blame and disbelief and unable to move forward. We unable to see our part in our dissolving marriage and unwilling to consider the possibility in life after divorce. Resistance adds more stress and tension into an already difficult situation.
The key to stepping into the possibility that your future holds is to learn to accept: accept the choices you made, accept the way your spouse behaves, accept that you marriage is dissolving and the divorce is happening.
By resisting, nothing changes except that it is harder and more stressful. By accepting, we begin to move through the hard time. Acceptance opens up choices and we can see more possibility with each decision we make. Acceptance enables us to channel our energy into what we do have control over. Listen in and follow the suggested action steps to help you move through your divorce.
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